1,000 is the number of tears I cried yesterday on my way to be baptized, and not because I was that excited… No, I was terrified and my mind was being filled with thoughts of how unworthy I was to be baptized I was going through an onslaught of doubt and insecurities that made me want to turn around and not go through with it.
My husband tried to encourage me and make me feel better, but as each person showed up I become increasingly nervous and it took all my strength not to cry and run away.
I’m so blessed to have wonderful and faith filled people in my life and as these friends showed up I opened up about the weird fears and worries I was feeling on such a beautiful and special day – Instead of feeling excited I was feeling defeated – the thoughts in my mind were not biblical – YHWH (YAHWEH/GOD) would never want us to speak with such condemnation about ourselves… and then truth from a friend poured into me strength to stand firm against the enemies attacks:
If the enemy is attacking you so strongly, he must really not want you to do this – so, even more reason why you should!
I was baptized as an infant and for the past 3 years wanted to be baptized as an adult and my testimony as well as everyone’s testimony is one of the most intimate and glorious things we can share with others about how YHWH works in our lives to make us new. The following is my, shortened, testimony and what I shared with the community of people who came to watch last night. And after you read my testimony I’ll share some tips on who to write yours – we should all have our testimony written down and add to it as YHWH continues to transform our lives.
At a young age I wanted to give my life to YHWH be a pastor even… but, after a lot of different rejections I ended up leaving YHWH in pursuit of love and self-worth in all the wrong places – for 18 years I lived by my flesh and the way of the world – through YHWHs mercy (as Pastor Dave talked about this morning) I met a friend who convinced me to go to church with her – I entered that day afraid everyone could see the sin seeping from my pores … but when the music started and worship began, it felt as if someone hugged me and a stillness within me said welcome home… that was 7 years ago….
Since that day YHWH has taken me on a journey! I have entered His presence and His word every morning and He has been faithful to remove the lies and wrong thought patterns in my mind that I believed and lived by – He is a wonderful teacher and has held me through the battles of breaking free of my flesh He has taught me how to have death to self and a life for Him and how much more of a life that is!
He is transforming me from the inside out to restore our relationship to a depth I can not explain, He has anchored my worth in Him and taught me how to receive Love – so that as He pours into me – I can pour out to others. I am a work in progress, but From Glory to glory- he is making me a new creation and will continue to every day as I enter His presence till I get to meet Him face to face.
So, Today I take the daily renewal of my mind and spirit a step further in baptism and in the washing of my body in the name of my King and Savior!
How to write your testimony
- Pray for guidance and ask God to reveal to you the moments He was calling you back to Him.
- What was your life like before God?
- What would relate most to the non-christians now? Where did you find your identity, security, happiness…? How did these things let you down?
- How did you find Christ?
- Where did it happen, how did it happen, where were you and who was with you?
- What is your life like now?
- What keeps you motivated to continue your faith? How is your life different now? Do you have specific character changes that you see? How about your attitude?
- Life isn’t perfect – never will be – but how does knowing Christ help you overcome challenges and obstacles you face?
Thank you for letting me share my testimony with you and I encourage all of you to know your own personal journey with God! Knowing how much He has pursued you will show you how loved you are and how special you are to Him – and if you’re that special to the creator of the universe (WHICH YOU ARE) ~ you too should love yourself and stop letting the enemies lies be what is ‘king’ over hear mind.